


The Man With The Bow Tie

by LoveAllTheFandoms



Category: Doctor Who (2005), House M.D.
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crossover, M/M, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-03
Updated: 2014-04-03
Packaged: 2018-01-18 01:40:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1410256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveAllTheFandoms/pseuds/LoveAllTheFandoms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Takes place after the series finale of House. Greg House and James Wilson get lost while camping. They nearly die but are rescued by the Doctor (Elven) and he invites House and Wilson to become his companions. The whole thing is a bit silly but a lot of fun. I'm currently working on a sequel right now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Man With The Bow Tie

Through reading police reports, doing some online research/ Googling, and by interviewing some of the people involved, I managed to get a pretty detailed account of what happened. House and I got lost on a camping trip—that part I knew—but it’s very difficult to have an adult declared dead, apparently. It didn’t seem to matter that I was only supposed to have a few months left when I disappeared. Two years after we vanished, my parents were able to get me listed as no deceased but until that time the police insisted on having me listed as a missing person. 

After my “death,” my estate was settled. They buried an empty coffin, and everyone was able to move on with their lives. Because House was also legally considered dead and therefore could never get another job, I suppose it’s best for everybody if we stay “dead.” However, I still want to get my story down. I think it’s important somebody know the truth, even if that somebody is me. 

xxxxxxxxx

House and I got hopelessly lost while on what was (probably) going to be our last hiking trip. We found a fresh water source, and rationed our food, but after nine days of wandering in search of the car, we were further from the trail than ever. After sixteen days, we were completely out of our own food. There was plenty of fresh water, but we were running low on pain pills, our phones were dead, and we had no idea where we were or how to get out. House’s leg was worse than I’d ever seen, and I could barely breathe. So, we gave up.

We set up our sleeping bags under the stars—we’d left several supplies, including the tent, behind four days earlier—built and maintained a small fire for warmth, and waited for death. One night, House started to harangue me about how starving to death, or dying from exposure, would be far preferable than waiting for the cancer to eat away at my insides, but I knew he was covering for his own fears. We were both terrified. I moved my sleeping bag close to his, and held my arm out. He curled up right beside me and we held each other. 

“I don’t think we have much longer. Neither of us has eaten in almost four days and we’re running low on water,” I explained. “I think it’ll be like falling asleep.” Greg nodded. Then, we heard a sort of humming/ whooshing sound, possibly from something mechanical. We’re saved, I thought. 

“Wilson, I think I’m hallucinating. There’s a big blue phone booth right in front of us,” he announced, pointing. I raised my head; prepared to tell him hallucinations were a natural part of the death process. 

“I see it too.” A man—late thirties, maybe older—with floppy hair stepped out of the box-thingy. He was wearing an unfashionable, old man’s suit, and even had on a bow tie!

“Oh good, you’re here,” he announced, in a thick English accent. “Last time I came round, I was a month early. Time before then, I was a year late, but never mind. I’m sure you are both quite famished, not to mention the thirst. Come along now, I haven’t got all day,” he explained, all but lifting up House and I, pulling us into the blue box. 

“Okay, now I know I’m hallucinating,” House declared as we stepped into what looked like the control center on a futuristic spaceship. 

“Down that hall and to the right,” the man with the bowtie announced. For whatever reason, House and I did as we were told. The inside of the box seemed to be endlessly huge. We found a room filled with tables of food, water, and fresh clothing. There were also some bunk beds, and a smaller room with a toilet and bathtub 

“Maybe so, but this is a fun hallucination,” I told my friend. “I say we go along with it. Don’t eat too much at once, though. Re-feeding syndrome and all. Just in case it’s not a dream.” House agreed. Later, we bathed, changed into clean clothes, ate a bit more, drank three bottles of water each, and slept for what felt like an eternity. After waking up, we went exploring and eventually found our way back to the control room. I was surprised by the lack of pain, and how much easier it seemed to breathe now. I felt better than I did before my diagnosis.

“Wilson, my leg doesn’t hurt,” House announced, sliding his hand over his thigh. “And the scar is gone.” 

“I probably should have asked permission first, but I cured your cancer, and fixed your leg,” the bow tie man exclaimed, popping out from behind a panel. “Well, not me…that was the Nanogenes, but I brought them on board. They’re a sort of futuristic...well your future anyway, medical technology from another planet. And you two are probably wondering what’s going on here, sorry. I’m the Doctor. I’m about a thousand-years-old and I come from a planet called Gallifrey, which makes me a bit of a time-traveling alien to you. That would be the short version. And you two…well you’re actually both quite clever and fascinating. Plus, you needed my help, and I hate to admit it, there’s a bit of a selfish element here on my part. I was lonely. 

"So, I went looking for some intelligent and interesting people in need of assistance. The TARDIS—that’s what we call the spaceship you’re on right now. From the outside it looks like a police box, but that’s just the chameleon circuit. Supposed to blend in, but it’s broken—found two people dying in the woods near Princeton, New Jersey. So, I rescued you two, hoping you’d be willing to come along on a few adventures with me.”  
I stood there smiling stupidly, feeling stunned, excited, happy, and quite confused. House, on the other hand, proceeded to ask the man with the bow tie question after question, each more confusing and complicated than the last. Although I had no idea what they were saying, I could see that Greg found the Doctor’s answers fascinating and acceptable. 

“This is most likely my own brain trying to cope with the trauma of my impending death, but I’ve always wanted a time machine. Might as well go along with it,” I told them, after a lull in a three-hour-long debate over quantum physics 

“Brilliant,” Mr. Bow Tie declared. “Where to first?” House stared at him blankly. Apparently, space and time travel were exciting to him in theory, but overwhelming in reality. I had similar feelings. 

“How about we start with something simple?” I suggested. “Something fun. Um—what exactly is out there in terms of aliens and stuff?” 

“About a billion planets with living creatures. Some of those are partially human; others are in no way related to Earth creatures. I think I know just the place for you, though,” he explained looking at House. “You’ll love it too,” he said to me. “Largest library in the universe. Haven’t been here in ages. There was some trouble last time but its all back to normal now.” He appeared momentarily saddened by something, but then set off pulling levers and turning dials and things. 

xxxxxxxxx 

House and I have been traveling with the Doctor for almost five Earth years now, and we’ve encountered all sorts of cool stuff. Occasionally, the two of them sort of forget I’m around, and every once in a while, we get into serious trouble. However, for the most part, it’s been more enjoyable and exciting than anything I could ever have hoped for in my old life.


End file.
